Another Twilightmovie, another crushing disappointment that they didn’t use the screenplay I submitted. I don’t know who this “Melissa Rosenberg” person is, but if she thinks her interpretation of Stephenie Meyer’s sacred prose is better than mine, she is mistaken. Here’s the script I wrote. You tell me which one is better.
By Eric D. Snider
Scene 1
EDWARD: Bella, I love you, and I want to go all the way with you. And by that I mean, I want to marry you.
BELLA: Ugh, you men are all alike. Don’t you ever think about anything other than monogamous commitment and eternal fidelity?
EDWARD: I’m sorry, it’s just how I am. Marry me!
BELLA: Change me!
EDWARD: … Change you? Listen, I don’t care how close we are, if you had an “accident,” you’re gonna have to–
BELLA: I meant change me into a vampire.
EDWARD: Oh. Well, I’ll only do that if you marry me.
BELLA: Why do we need a ceremony and a piece of paper to prove we love each other? Isn’t it enough that you stalk me day and night and that I once jumped off a cliff because you went to Italy?
EDWARD: Oh, Bella. So modern and liberated!
Filed under: Romance, Sci-Fi & Fantasy, Mystery & Suspense, Fandom
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